Tonight’s opponent for the Fighting DeChellises: The New Jersey Institute Of Technology…Seriously? WTF? Who schedules this garbage? Oh, that’s right, the dipshits who put together the “Philly Classic” field. Well, here’s a hearty FUCK YOU to you guys for giving us an opponent that’s only in their third season as a Division I team, can barely score over 30 points in a game, currently sports a 34-game losing streak (including an 0-29 season last year), and are about to suffer their 35th straight defeat tonight.
There’s not even a fucking line on this game, and with good reason. The Philly Classic committee might as well have invited ITT Tech’s intramural champions, at least I could stomach that better than a fake Division I basketball program.
Did I also mention their logo looks like something that was created in a “Basics of Anime Drawing” class? The logo’s probably more of a threat to come to life and launch a glowing fireball attack on Talor Battle than NJIT is to win this game.
Now, for those of you who like butt-rape: The game will be televised on Big Ten Network at 7 PM tonight. It’ll likely make for great background noise for *ahem* certain extracurricular activities you may be involved with.